Is wearing Jeans/Pants haram for Muslim women?
There certainly are some scholars that will say that women wearing pants is haram because it falls under the "imitation of men". However there are also scholars that say there is nothing that specifically forbids wearing pants, and that as long as women follow the guidelines of modesty by wearing loose-fitting pants it is acceptable. As you may have noticed, there are Islamic sub-cultures and many muslimahs who do wear baggy pants as part of a two-piece outfit, and I've never personally seen anyone approach them to tell them to stop.
It sounds like you live in a western culture. As I've said before, trying to stick to a strict interpretation of sharia in an un-Islamic culture (particularly if a woman is working) is really impractical. There are scholars who live and work in the west who understand this, and teach that the moderate course is to go ahead and wear loose pants, and cover the rest of yourself as you would normally.
On the issue of shaking hands, here again is a controversy between strict and loose interpretations. Generally, non-mahrems are not to touch each other at all, for any reason. Yet, in a western culture (especially in corporate culture), following this in entirety would be seen as rude and may jeopardize one's livelihood. Even though Islam sets clear guidelines about how non-mahrems should interact, Islam also teaches that we should keep good and peaceful relations with non Muslims around us. For that reason, some would say that "shaking hands" is permitted (although it may be disliked) because it is a cultural norm that is more noticeable when NOT practiced (ie: someone tries to shake your hand and you refuse).
I realize these are not clear-cut answers, but such is the case with a lot of legal technicalities like these, particularly when practiced in a western setting. If you want to research the issue further, talk to a few local imams where you live and see what their views are. I'm sure after getting more information you will have a conviction about how you want to approach this in your own life.
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